Aristotle on Persuasion

There is a mechanical rule I learned early in meditation practice: "to open ears, operate mouth." What that says is this: that in order for someone to hear what you've got to say, they need to feel that what they have to say has been heard and understood. From the perspective of the hearer, a "yes, but" cancels out the sense of having been heard and understood -- the very purpose of the argument. Some people thrill at being able to say "yes, but" in many different ways. This can be an amusing diversion, but it misses the point. A salutary rule for true communication might read "Never in words or substance say 'yes, but.'" Phrases like "What you're saying is that... " are effective when coupled with a statement that the listener will recognize as at least as favorable to their position as what they said.

Aristotle on Persuation

by Barbara Ashley Phillips